Friday, November 14, 2008

Adventures in Babysitting

I have a friend here who I adore.  I also adore her children.  That is why, when she asks me if I would please watch them for her I don't hesitate in the slightest.  Because I love them all.  

This friend has a little boy Clarkie who is about 2 and a half.  He is energetic and crazy and oh so cute.  They also have a little girl who is about 6 months.  

We always have a lot of fun, but sometimes there are times when I wonder if I am ready for this.  

Scene 1:

Beautiful fall day.  We are outside playing and running around and kicking balls.  The baby starts fussing so I pick her up.  She decides to spit up all over me so I tell Clarkie that I will be right back.  I run in the house with the baby, grab a cloth and run back out.  (The yard in enclosed, by the way)  I am literally gone for 2 minutes, if that.  In that 2 minutes Clarkie discovers the kiddie pool that is full of nasty brown rain water with leaves floating around in it.  I come outside to discover that he is bent over the pool, lapping the water up!  Excellent!  

"Clarkie!"  I say.  He looks at me with a huge grin and announces in his most adorable two year old voice, " I dwink the durty watur!"  

"Yes, you did!" I respond.  Can you tell me how much you drank?  A lot? A little?

Still grinning and pointing to the pool, "I dwink the durty watur!"  

Right.  Got it.  Ok, well there weren't any chemicals in the water so I decide that maybe he will have a stomach ache, but maybe not, but that it is probably fine.  

It is fine.  His mom thinks that it is hilarious when I tell her so I am relieved.  

Scene 2:

Yesterday.  Clarkie has locked himself in his room.  Fine.  He can unlock it too and there is nothing that he can get hurt on.  He falls asleep which is also great.  But, he is potty training and doesn't have a diaper on so I am anticipating wet clothes when he emerges.  

I am right.  He emerges, soaked, and not at all happy to see me.  

After I convince him that he will feel much better if he puts on the new McQueen underwear that his mom bought him he agrees to change his clothes.  Off come the soaked pants and socks. next, the underwear, and lo and behold there is quite a load!  A load that has been slept in! Excellent!  No wonder he is grumpy.  

I have a moment of panic.  What do I do with all this...poo?  Wipes?  No, too much.  Bathtub and wipes is the only thing I can think of.  So, we wipe and we wash and we rinse and out comes a clean and happy boy very excited to put on his new underwear and go play with his cars.  

Then I turn to the underwear.  Suddenly a random thought pops into my head that I remember my mom or somebody telling me about cloth diapers.  if you hold them in the toilet and flush, the poo comes off and flushes down the toilet.  

Worked like a charm.  Thanks whoever told me that.  

Lucky for me the baby was just chilling in her crib where I had placed her prior to discovering the load.  

Lucky for us I won't birth a toddler and a baby.  But holy cow.  Am I really ready for gross toddler loads and drinking dirty water?  No, I'm not.  But I'm sure I will warm up to the idea.  

Sunday, November 9, 2008

last one

I promise, this is my last politics post for a long time:

The University of Michigan has a cool analysis of the election results. Traditionally, the major news organizations show maps like this one:



The problem is, this type of representation doesn't factor in population densities, and it is binomial (either red or blue). It makes it look like Obama didn't do very well, especially in the mid-west and south.

So let's see what it would look like if you scaled for population density:



Better, but we still don't see how the counties voted, and the colors are still binomial. If you factor in these variables you get a much more telling (albeit impressionistic) map:



Now we can see a few trends: several large populations that voted almost unanimously for Obama, a majority of the country that was somewhere in the middle, and only some focal regions that were overwhelming in support of McCain.

You can see all their maps, and a discussion, here.

A professor at Princeton put together an animation of the country and how we've voted over time, but it doesn't yet include the 2008 results.

Friday, November 7, 2008

Black in White

Here is a touching article about the former White House butler. It helps put in perspective how significant this election really was.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/11/06/AR2008110603948.html?sid=ST2008110604101&s_pos=

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Poppage

Tuesday was a really good day for me, and not just because Obama was elected as President.

Tuesday a really gutsy woman at the fabric store asked me when I was DUE!

Now, I don't look terribly pregnant. If I wear even a semi baggy shirt you can't tell too much, especially if you didn't know me pre-pregnancy. I've kind of stuck to the baggy route so far because I don't exactly feel like I have a "cute" pregnant belly. Mainly I just feel thick and chubby and not cute. Tuesday, however, I donned a shirt that was a little tighter and made me look decidedly "cuteish" pregnant.

Allison and i go to the fabric store and this random woman asks me when I am due. This comment was followed by a really awkward exchange in which I blurt out "You think I am pregnant!" all excited, which was the exact wrong thing to say because she thought that she just made a HUGE mistake. But, I assured her that she had not made a mistake and that she was my new favorite person. She said that my "belly" didn't look like it belonged on my body since my arms and legs were skinny, which also made my day.

I really like that woman. I wish I had her on speed dial for when I am having a non-attractive feeling day.

My belly appears to be here to stay. No more disappearing acts during the night. I was 20 weeks on Monday, half-way through!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Mondo mega picture

Check this out. It's a 17 megapixel picture from Yosemite National Park. Keep clicking on the image until you've zoomed in all the way and you will be truly amazed. A few good things to look for: The bridge over the waterfall off to the right and the rock climbers on the wall in the center. If you find anything else of interest, leave it in the comments!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Here he is, Governor Palin

Someone found the real Joe Sixpack:

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

On Corporate Politics

Today I had the privilege of witnessing the most amazing display of corporate politics EVER. 

Let me start at the beginning.  

There is a group of guys that I work with that everybody else loving refers to as the "Boys Club".  These are all men in there 30's and 40's who still are deluded into thinking that they are still living their glory days, even though all married with children (except one), middle aged and overweight.  Not that those years aren't the glory years or anything, but seriously, stop acting like you are 24 and that women even remotely dig you.  

 They leave work early to go out for beers, golfing, etc, the typical things.  They take a breakfast break every morning at 9am and a lunch break every day at noon....all together.  They even have these beer steins in the shape of cowboy boots that they take to bars with them....super cool.  

One of these guys has had every female (5 to be exact) that has worked for him file an HR complaint and all of them have left, except my friend who worked for him who fought tooth and nail to make sure something came of it.  But nothing ever did, and he said some pretty messed up things to her.  

The same guy once shouted "Let's Drink!" with both fists raised high in the air after a group meeting when we were all supposed to meet at a local pub for beers and pool.  Seriously? For a second I was expecting everybody to put on togas or something.   And he is second in command to the Grand Poobah.  These are the people running the show.  So sad. 

The Grand Poobah is the director of our department and also a member of the Boys Club.  Our company is currently undergoing a massive reorganizations.  So this guy manages to get a job in the new organization, which quite frankly is beyond me, and several other people I might add.  

Two months ago they announced that my therapeutic area was going to be reorganized resulting in massive layoffs.  We all had to reapply for our jobs and it was great fun.  

Today they told us if we had been, oh, what did they call it....some supremely corporate buzz word I can't remember....along the lines of laid off or not.   They got rid of 80% of my department. Ouch. 
 
So the Grand Poobah was in charge of reading all of our little forms we filled out and selecting those people who were given positions in the new organization. 

Guess who got to keep their jobs?

The members of the Boys Club. 

Guess who got let go?

Everybody else.  

Including yours truly and a lot of other really good scientists.  

At the beginning of all this I really wanted to think that it had nothing to to with skill or ability and it was just where your position happened to fall within the new organization.  Nothing personal, just business.  Right?

But after today, it seems that it is more about who you schmooze with than anything else.  I mean, what a coincidence that all of the Boys Club members got to keep their jobs when the Grand Poobah was the one deciding.  Do I really think that all of their positions just happen to fall into the new business model?  No, I don't.  I think it was more about who you know and who you schmooze with.  

Well, the only person I schmooze with is Colin G and apparently that was the wrong person.  

But let's face it, he is WAY hotter than any member of the Boys Club, and even though I may not have my job, at least I have my integrity.  

Keep me because I do good work, not because I schmooze with the right people.  

Amazing.  

I'm not upset about the loss,  just really really annoyed.   I got a great severance package and judging by who is left, I think I wouldn't have been happy there anyway.  

But still.  

The Boys Club prevailed.